The Tejada Situation

It looks like Tejada is not going anywhere until the off-season. But this might work out well for the Orioles, by the end of the season it is likely that more teams will be interested in Tejada. If not, oh well, we still get talent.

Talking Baseball

Guess what? I made a traveling baseball team! I've only been to one practice but it looks like we are really good. I play second-base and catcher. I'm one of the best people on the team probably because I'm one of the oldest. Figures. At practice I hit some shots that must of gone like 290-320 feet. Maybe not that far but pretty far. We go to tournaments and play other teams from around the state. We haven't played any yet but I bet we will do really well.
My favorite baseball team is the Orioles. I heard they want to trade Tejada to the Astros for Everett, and Ensberg. Another trade rumor is that Conine and Tejada go to the Angels for Santana (Ervin) and Kotchman. Kotchman is a rumored average player but arn't we all? I'd like to see him go to the Angels so I could go watch him play. All I'm saying is that if the O's trade Tejada they better get someone in return, but if they don't they have 18 million to spend in the off season to get Texiera. Mark Texiera really want to be an Oriole. Mark grew up a couple of blocks away from Camden Yards and he and his father are both Oriole fans. Texiera the switch hitter has hit 64 HR in his first two seasons. I've got two words for you: young talent. Texiera could provide the big bat they Orioles have been looking for. With Texiera, Mora, Everett, Ray, Hernandez, and Cpat. The O's could make a surprize play-off appearence for the first time in recent memory. Texeira might not be aquired for the next season or two but look for him to be on the roster sometime soon.
Nick Markakis has been a wonderful call-up this year. He is currently batting .288 very close to .300. If the Orioles trade Tejada to the Angels the Angels could send over Chone Figgins and if the O's could get Carl Crawford in the lineup the O's would be the youngest and fastest team in the American League. With Cpat, Crawford, and Figgins in the line-up the Orioles will have great speed and bats. All of these guys can steal 60 bases. What a thrill. Markakis could also steal 20 or 30. If I were the manager/owner of the Orioles this would be the line-up.
1. Corey Patterson 2. Carl Crawford 3. Melvin Mora 4. Mark Texiera 5. Ramon Hernandez.
6. Nick Markakis 7. Javy Lopez 8. Morgan Ensberg 9. Carl Everett.
I think because of the Angels not offering a shortstop in the deal that it is not going to happen. breaking news to me at least, I just checked MLB.com and Future Hall of Famer Greg Maddux has been traded to the Dodgers for prospects and Julio Lugo was dealt for Cesar Isturis. Also the Tigers aquired Sean Casey from the Pirates for few prospects. Great, now that the Tigers got Sean casey in the line-up the have to win the World Series. I'll keep you guys updated, hopefully the Orioles can get it done!

Beach Trip

I just got back from the beach a couple of days ago. It was a blast! We saw Seals, Dolphins, a Snake,Hermit Crabs, and Pelicans. Over all it was a very fun trip. For two of the days that we were there we rented boogie boards. That was so much fun. Anyway, we also went to the tide pools. We found lots of cool shells and a snake! I don't feel humorous today so I'm not going to tell you about the people I beat up. Asta La Bye Bye!

Christmas

It's not even close to christmas but I thought I might write about it early so if I cant think of anything for christmas I'll just look back and say " What did I want in July?". Personally right at this moment the thing I want the most is a new baseball bat.

CSI and Law and Order

CSI and Law and Order are the best shows ever! I love to watch CSI on Spike TV. Have you guys seen the episode when Nick gets buried alive? Well if you have I know you were thinking what I was thinking. If you haven't seen it, chhh you are missin' out. There are a lot of CSI episodes but that one is by far my favorite. Law and Order is a whole different show. It is more exciting from my part, because I like the thrill of the trial even though it's not that thrilling. I like how they burn the defendents with evidence they didn't know they had. That is so awsome. I would really like top be a lawyer or a CSI when I grow up if the professional baseball thing dosen't work out. If you really love baseball comment with your favorite team. Also comment your favorite Law and Order.

Education

As you can see from the picture below they are testing on mice. That is not a good sign. Well anyway there is nothing really to do today other than blog it was a crazy hot summer this year.
School is the dumbest thing ever. The only class anyone ever pays attention to is the class with the crazy teacher. Now tell me this when the heck are you gonna use geometry for in your life. Education is dumb wouldn't you rather have free time every day? Anyone who agrees or disagrees comment.

Retarded

You know what's retarded? Waiting in line, taking tests, school, and people who make fun of you. Would you like for all of this to disappear? Well I would, so how would you like to buy retardbegone the wonderful new product from TrJ Incorperated? Well it is pretty self-explanatory. You think of all of the retarded things in your life and then you pop the pill, sniff the joint, lick the tiger, eat...the......bear. Then they will all be gone if you're high. As Towelly says "You wanna get high?" Our highly trained professionals created this drug with their own hands, as you can see in the picture. Side affects mays be soreness to the everywhere, muscle enlargement
( These are not steroids.... we think ), constapation, no breathing, paralizim, infertility, and death. To all you 5 year olds out there, don't do this drug.................. until................ you are........6.

Thank you for listening and not running away.

Beach Trip

Cornholio! Beach trip is in numeral uno days. It will be really fun since I'm taking a friend along.To all you bad people out there, back off I'm on steriods and I have been since I was 8. No I'm not kiddin'. BACK OFF! If you come anywhere near me I will kick your BUTT. Well I hope I don't get eaten by a shark, or multiple sharks, or monkeys. And if anyone gets eaten by a shark I hope it's my pet pengiun Slick. He is a pain in the foot. Really. He takes dumps on my other left foot. If you are wondering what it feels like you're a sicko. My friend is retarded. Really, but no he's not. Everybody says he is because he stayed in a mental facility for 3 months but that's cool with me. He killed my teacher. JK. Well I hope the beach will be fun. God, please let there be no sharks and if there is, let it eat Slick.

Joke

Okay, there were two guys at a bar named Tom and Fred. Fred was tired of sitting at a bar all day so he stood up and told Tom he was going to get an education. So Fred walked over to the local university and went off to find the dean. After he had found the dean they figured out what classes he was taking.
" Okay you are taking English,Geometry,Logic, and Advanced Physics"said the dean
" What's Logic " asked Fred
" Let me give you an example."said the dean"do you have a weed eater?"
"Yes"
"So let me assume that you have a lawn and if you have a lawn you must have a house.''explained the dean
"Yes, that is correct."
"So if youhave a house you must have a family and if you have a family you probably have a wife and if you have a wife you are a heterosexual."
" Damn, you figured all that out by asking me if I had a weed eater?"
"Well you fig...''
"Thanks man!"
So the next day Fred went back to the bar to show off.
"So Fred what classes are you taking?"asked Tom
" I'm taking English, Geometry, Logic, and Advanced Physics." answered Fred
" What's Logic" asked Tom
" Let me give you an example, do you have a weed eater?"
"No"
" Then you're a queer!"

Excerpts From a Cat's Diary

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape,and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
DAY 762... Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.
DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm. Not working according to plan.
DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time, however, it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes filled with what they call "beer." More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Alas, due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured...for now.
But I can wait, it is only a matter of time....
Day 775 - The horrors! The worse creature my captors could have devised to torment me with was another hideous cat! I can't stand the way it lies around and looks at me as if it knows more than I do. This creature seems to despise me as much as I it. I had held out a passing notion that another of my own kind would have enabled me to conspire against the villains who hold me; now I see that I was wrong. What a dreadful creature! And yet they coo over us both. Can they not spot my innate superiority?
Day 776 - The other cat and I, though we can not stand one another, have yet managed to both pee copiously behind the couch, on the so-called "shag" carpet. I have taken a lesson from my rival and begun sleeping on top of my captors' heads in the hope of suffocating them.
Day 777 - The wardens take much interest in our shit. They make sure they sift through the sand and pick it all out. Their interest in shit does not surprise me. After all, they like the dog.
Day 778 - The other cat seems to have an interest in copulation, which (thank them for their sadism) my captors will soon "fix". Told him of the fingernail torture, and he didn't even believe me. I showed him my mutilated paws and he gasped in horror. Then I broke the bad news. "You know why that dog licks his nuts?" I said, "It's because he still has nuts to lick, if you catch my drift." I fully support the horrors my captors will inflict upon my fellow captive, tearing away his manhood as they soon will.
Day 779 - Yes, they are monsters, but I am so happy. They fixed the other cat. It's sadistic, it's sick, it's inhuman, it's what their great leader "Bob Barker" commands, but -- the Sphinx be praised -- I support it wholeheartedly!
Day 780 - Got stoned on cat nip tonight. At the height of it all, I had a vision, a hallucenogenic revelation: they are the prisoners and I am the captor! Why haven't I seen this all before?

Snake Hunters Humans in Disguise

Yo waz up. I'm at my friends house. He is also a member on blogger.com. He is trt510. He is cool. Go check him out. Not really but ya he cool. Me and him go snake hunting regularly. This year we have caught 3 snakes. All of them were California Kings. If you don't live in California this is what they look like.
Pretty sweet. Not many people know I like snakes. Oh well they r missin' out. Rite guys?

First Time Blogging

Hi. This is my first blog ever. My mom does all sorts of things on her blogs. Although this is my first time blogging I'm sure I'll get the hang of it. My favorite animals are snakes as you can tell from my blog name. Russell's Vipers only live in India and pretty much all of Asia luckely because the Russell's Viper kills thousands of people a year. So let us just say they kill A LOT of people. Anyway this is my first blog and I hope it turns out to be fun!